{ 14 comments… read them below or add one }

car_craze_gal June 13, 2011 at 7:01 pm

Dont worry.. be Happy !

sarcastic_cheeto June 13, 2011 at 7:16 pm

i keep a positive attitude… but i keep losing it

though i have been known to smack annoying people upside the head with my bag of positive attitude… only those that deserve it lol

HoustonBound June 13, 2011 at 8:10 pm

You have every right to have a negative attitude and be mad at the world. Just dont let it affect the people around you.

auntb93 June 13, 2011 at 8:39 pm

I do get tired of it at times. I’ve had a lot of bad luck in the last year or so, and to me, it just seems condescending. But I generally just say, “I’ll try,” so as not to get involved in a conversation about how banal they are.

Jack Meoff June 13, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Actually you’re right.
No one really wants to be told that. What they want is some help achieving a positive attitude.
It’s easy for people to tell you what you should do. It takes a lot more effort to help a person do it.

Mrs.Foster June 13, 2011 at 9:00 pm

Having a positive attitude doesn’t denote having a “perma-grin” it means trying to find the best in situations, or being proactive in problem solving any difficulties that you may have. Everyone is entitled to their moods and their feelings, but when the moods and feelings impact you in a negative way, it helps to put a postive reframe on the situation.

valkyria June 13, 2011 at 9:40 pm

Well, I find it totally irritating. It is easy for them to give advice and not so easy to always use it. If I always had a positive attitude, I wouldn’t suffer from depression. AA says to “fake it ’til ya make it”. I don’t know if that works or not. Faking it seems to be cheating. I mean part of my problem is not acknowledging my feelings. Seems like smiling all the time would be denying my feelings.

BroadwaySomeday June 13, 2011 at 9:41 pm

I think it’s a good concept…but it’s becoming unhealthy that everyone feels the need to hide their feelings and always be happy. I think people should be allowed to get angry or sad without someone obnoxiously saying “think about….” or “you should be more…”.
It doesn’t help at all. When you are mad, be mad; sad, be sad. And the person you are venting too should just agree or help without bringing out society’s favored emotions.

bigbluesky2006 June 13, 2011 at 9:45 pm

Usually when someone says “keep a positive attitude”, I ask “how do i do that?” and that shuts them up straightaway.

I think wearing a fake smile is stupid. If you don’t feel like smiling, don’t smile, it’s that simple.

intelligentblackwomanwithgoals June 13, 2011 at 10:33 pm

No not really. I believe that you should smile only when you feel like smiling. I do however believe that you should keep a positive attitude. Although they are closely related, I believe smiling always will only make yourself and other people realize how fake you can be. If you let your face fit the way you feel, people will know that you are real person, with flaws, not an imitation of perfection. A positive attitude always helps any situation, but you don’t need a smile to prove that you have a positive disposition. I can be positive about anything, and not smile.

mickjam June 13, 2011 at 11:19 pm

No, I don’t think people should wear a fake smile, but I do think that people can stop broadcasting thier sadness, anger, and frustration. That’s a lot worse. I’m tired of everyone else’s beef.
I’ve got my own. I don’t need to hear yours. How about we do this? I’ll keep it to myself and take care of it. You do the same.

On the flip side, it does me good, you good, everyone good to be in contact with people who are happy, smiling, and positive.
I’ve been through a lot of #*%* in my life. My positive attitude got me through it. I don’t understand how you see a problem in that. I think you are sounding like you want what I had to go through. Watch your back, cause it’s going to hurt bad.

butterfly_grrl June 14, 2011 at 12:05 am

Do you find people telling you to keep a positive attitude a lot? Is this a sign that you’re excessively negative? Perhaps an alternative way of looking it it is that people are trying to encourage you. We all like to have a good mope and moan from time to time, but if you hear it a lot, you might be partly responsible for it.
I shan’t say ‘keep positive’ – I’ll use a saying from England – ‘keep your pecker up’ – I promise you, it’s not rude!

Brian R June 14, 2011 at 12:24 am

No I’m not. We don’t have to always smile. Sadness once learned is not a lesson to be repeated however. Happiness is an attitude and a choice. A positive attitude will lead you to more confidence and more successes earned by overcoming your failures, even if – like Thomas Edison you have, “10,000 attempts which did not work.”

Getting sick of anything creates a negative attitude and whether you want to believe it or not you attract into your life the same exact energies you give off… simply because other people, who can otherwise help you, read these energies in the form of emotions and people in high postitions who think positive will not want to be in your company.

To your first reply, the guy who said that recent findings suggest that keeping a positive attitude may be harmful: I study this and plan to make a future living at it. What he refers to is a study by a psychiatrist named, Susan C. Segerstrom. The study simply says that a pessimist will make out better when he/she fails at a challenge simply because he/she will back down from the challenge in the face of failure. What the study did not even look into is the fact that there are situational optimists who are optimistic about only certain situations and there are dispositional optimists, who are optimistic about everything.

I believe in taking many attempts at a challenge. If football didn’t have 4 downs to covert a first down it would probably be a pretty boring sport. I do, however, believe in acceptance after (and only after) you have given it your best several times. That makes me both a situational and dispositional optimist… better known as a dynamic optimist.

I believe that no matter what I will find a way to be happy, because I choose it, but I will also give it my best over many attempts to create a better life.

solange June 14, 2011 at 12:37 am

Oh that is too funny! Yeh, sometimes life throws you curves and you just get down. I allow myself 15 minutes to FEEL MEAN, haha. I journal awful things about it, get it out of my system. Then, I do try to do something to feel better, call it “positive” if you like, such as going for a walk, trying to help somebody who’s in worse shape than me, anything, ya know. Cause if I dwell on it, get on my pity pot, it just gets worse. Hang in there man, you are not the only one.

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